OF PAST REGRETS AND FUTURE FEARS
by Ann3
Summary: In this sequel to Any Port in a Storm, Jesse has some serious decisions to make...


OF PAST REGRETS AND FUTURE FEARS

Written by Ann Rivers ann.rivers@virgin.net

Completed 22 February 2002

Summary: This story follows on from Any Port in a Storm

As he and Susan get reacquainted, Jesse questions his motives for doing so…

Spoilers: Bachelor Fathers, Misdiagnosis Murder and Dead in the Water

Disclaimer: Diagnosis Murder and its characters belong to CBS and Viacom.

No profit is being made from their use here

For the second night running, she'd drifted to sleep with his arms wrapped gently around her.

And not on the couch this time, but somewhere a lot more comfortable. A lot more familiar.

As dawn broke on Sunday morning, Susan lay watching him as Jesse slept peacefully beside her – 

enjoying the drowsy smile that settled on his face as she gently stroked back his hair.

Enjoying, too, this quiet opportunity to reflect on what had been a highly eventful couple of days.

Thanks to Jesse and Mark, she had her old job back – the job she'd loved and hated to leave.

Steve was checking that her disclaimer from Nathaniel was legally binding, and Jesse…

That had been the greatest surprise of all – one that she still couldn't quite believe.

While confident of his help with the baby, she hadn't expected to spend the night with him.

And she certainly hadn't expected to move in with him, let alone share his bed again.

But then he'd just been through a traumatic ordeal himself. One that had nearly cost him his life.

And, as Mark had quietly told her the previous night, he needed her now as much as she needed him.

When they'd got home, they'd talked well into the night, each comforting the other through their pain.

Then, perhaps inevitably, they'd spent the rest of that night wrapped tightly in each other's arms. Slowly and gently healing the other's pain. Reaffirming the love they'd once shared.

Now, with Jesse still lying asleep in her arms, Susan was taking this chance to rediscover him.

The face was as boyish as ever, yet older somehow – aged by that past week's harrowing events.

Or maybe it was the hair – shorter than the tousled blond mop that she'd grown so used to.

It had turned darker too, a sure sign that summer was reluctantly giving way to the change in season. 

She was still exploring, stroking the scar on his shoulder, when a sleepily amused voice startled her. "If you promise to keep doing what you're doing, I'll let you see my appendectomy scar…"

The temptation to look was overwhelming – the temptation to tease him instead even stronger.

"Been there… seen that…" she sighed, choosing her moment before adding in a silky purr, 

"But what I've always wanted to know is how you got that cute little one on your tushie…"

Still half asleep, Jesse simply grinned and rolled onto his side to enjoy the full benefit of her touch.

Two seconds later the penny dropped and his eyes snapped open, wide in a rapidly reddening face. 

"Hey, how'd you…? I – I mean, when did you…? How come you know that…?" he said at last –

quickly rolling onto his back again while Susan tried in vain not to laugh.

Okay, he silently groused, dumb question. She did, after all, know him… well, _very_ intimately.

Jeez, not even his own mother knew him the way Susan did…

Still laughing at the coyness on his face, she stole a quick kiss on his cheek before sliding out of bed. 

"I'd love to stay and tell you, Jesse, but we still have a lot of catching up to do…" she replied – 

her turn to blush as Jesse, composure restored, grinned back at her and cheekily wiggled his eyebrows.

"Not _that_ kind of catching up…!" she giggled – although she had to admit she was sorely tempted. 

Quickly dressing before she could change her mind, she enjoyed one last kiss before moving away. 

Thwarted, for the moment at least, Jesse's hopes of going back to sleep were soon noisily dashed – 

the hum of his washing machine compelling him to get up and lend an albeit reluctant hand.

By the time he emerged from his bedroom, his living room resembled a self service laundromat.

Jesse stood and stared, astonished that such a small suitcase could hold so much clothing.

"You know…" he said at last, moving hastily aside as Susan dumped yet another pile at his feet. 

"If we became naturists, we wouldn't have to bother with all this laundry…"

He was quick enough to dodge the cushion which the helplessly grinning Susan then hurled at him, 

but not quite quick enough to avoid her follow up of a beautifully aimed pair of jeans which now curled themselves around his head.

"That's true… but think of all the people who'd then get to see _all_ your scars…" Susan shot back, 

taking great satisfaction in watching that adorably jeans-draped face turn a deeper shade of scarlet. Laughing at his mock horrified look, she then pointed towards one of the tidily sorted piles. 

"Okay, that one next, then we can start on the separates…"

"Couldn't we just put the whole lot in together…?" the still jeans-draped Jesse asked plaintively. 

At Susan's wry look, he pulled a face back at her before dutifully picking up the indicated bundle. 

He couldn't help but wonder how he'd defend himself if she decided to throw something else at him. 

Catch it in his teeth, perhaps…?

Close, and he had to admit that the pair of bright red socks which now landed on his head matched the colour of his face quite beautifully.

"Not unless you want to go into work tomorrow with bright pink boxer shorts…" Susan retorted, lifting one of his shirts from the bundle in his arms while favouring him with a slyly mischievous grin. 

"Although I have to say, they'd match perfectly with this…"

"Hey, it was white when I bought it…!" Jesse protested, so defensively that Susan burst out laughing. "The wail of pink shirted bachelors everywhere…" she sighed, gently tousling the evidence in his face. 

Laughing once more at the glare she received in response, Susan then eyed him in mock exasperation. 

"I can see it's going to be quite a challenge to get you properly domesticated…"

"Oh, yippee… yet more laundry…" Jesse muttered, pulling an appropriately rueful face.

He was soon smiling again, though, as consolation came in now familiar, very welcome form.

"Put me down, you gorgeous insatiable woman…" Jesse murmured when she finally released him, 

his attempt to look and sound disapproving not really helped by the broad grin on his face.

"_I'm_ insatiable…?" Susan raised an eyebrow in polite disbelief – her next words equally sceptical. 

"So who was it who came out with some zany theory that making love cures morning sickness…?"

"You mean it didn't work…?" Jesse stared at her, all wide eyed if highly dubious innocence. 

In fact it had – wonderfully, too. But she wasn't going to tell him that. He looked too smug already…

Susan then grinned in sly anticipation as she watched Jesse retreat into the living room.

So, he thought he'd won that little argument, did he…? Well, he'd thought wrong…

Jesse was now too distracted in sorting through the laundry to notice her sneaking up behind him – 

her stealthy ambush catching him sufficiently off guard to gently blindside him onto the floor. 

Slowly recovering, Jesse stared up into that sweetly smiling face – and knew he was in serious trouble. 

"Not entirely, no… maybe I need a little less theory and a lot more practice…" she grinned – 

any argument he may have planned lost in another slow, gently lingering kiss.

Even when that kiss was over, Jesse could only stare up at her in still dumbstruck surprise.

Not that he was minded, of course, but… boy, this was like when they'd first met all over again. 

Those heady, exciting first weeks in their relationship when they couldn't get enough of each other.

Maybe it was due to her pregnancy, but… well, Susan had never been this intense with him before.

It was as though she were claiming him again. Staking her rights – and making sure no one else could.

As if sensing his thoughts, she kissed him again, wrapping her arms possessively around his neck. 

Even if he'd been able to argue or move, Jesse had no inclination whatsoever to do so.

Instead, happily allowing her to claim him a little more, he lay staring pensively at the ceiling. 

Suddenly he had a hell of a lot to think about… 

He was still deep in thought later that afternoon, when they arrived at Community General – 

his unusual quietness and distracted smile telltale signs that weren't lost on Mark Sloan.

Before he could pursue it, however, a familiar sound brought a welcome sign of normality – 

distracted eyes suddenly alert as a squad of doctors and nurses rushed towards the ambulance bay. 

"Looks like you're pretty busy today…" Jesse said at last, glancing quizzically up at Mark.

While glad of the chance of some help, Mark couldn't help but make a still concerned point.

"Don't worry, Jess, we're covered well enough to manage… besides which, this is your day off… 

and you're supposed to be getting therapy on that shoulder…" 

Wisely choosing not to tell him what kind of therapy he'd had already, Jesse held up his hands.

"Mark, believe me, I'm fine… here, look… fully mobile, no pain and no stiffness…" he replied,

raising and lowering his arm several times to demonstrate before he hugged Susan and grinned. "Besides which, I already have my very own live in nurse…"

"Yes, and in that capacity I've made sure he's been getting plenty of therapy on it…" Susan agreed – hoping Mark had missed the colour rising in her face as, hearing Jesse snigger, she added quickly, "He's… uh… been helping me with all the laundry I brought down from Oregon…"

To her relief, that little faux pas looked to have gone unnoticed as they headed across the lobby – 

although it was several minutes before she trusted herself to meet Jesse's eyes. 

A short time later, however, all thoughts of therapy, of whatever kind, were totally overwhelmed.

They had all seen ultrasounds before, of course. Those wondrous images of the first weeks of life.

But the grainy pictures that flickered on the monitor beside them were especially profound.

Needless to say, Susan was deeply and visibly moved by these first images of this, her first baby – 

clearly appreciating Mark's reassuring smile and the comfort of Jesse's arm around her shoulders.

And, to Mark's tactfully quiet amusement, Jesse himself was totally and completely transfixed – 

his polite enquiry over whether his young friend was alright met with a vague, still mesmerised nod.

It was left to Susan herself to voice that amusement as she met Mark's eyes and grinned.

"I think we've finally found a way to keep him quiet…!"

"Apparently so…" Mark agreed just as dryly – more serious, though, as he helped her to sit up.

Beyond all his excitement at seeing the baby, that slightly troubled look had returned to Jesse's eyes – and Mark now had a fair idea as to its cause.

No one knew better than he did how devastated Jesse had been by the events of the previous week, 

and Mark still deeply regretted not sticking to his guns and insist that Jesse took a paternity test.

At least then he'd have known the truth before forging a bond that had been so painful to break.

The circumstances now were different, of course. Jesse knew he wasn't the father of Susan's baby.

And while proud of his willingness to take on that role regardless, Mark still felt a little uneasy. 

His young friend had gone through enough traumas already, without facing any further heartbreak. 

With her tests now over, Susan then left to enjoy a cleansing shower before they headed for home – 

thankfully oblivious to the underlying relief in Jesse's smile as she stole a parting kiss on his cheek. 

With little time to spare before she returned, Jesse came straight to the surprisingly blunt point. 

"Mark, I – I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing here… with the baby, I mean…" he said at last – 

struggling to put his doubts and concerns into words as they walked together along the corridor. 

"I mean, with all this happening so soon after Grace came to me with Casey, and how I felt about him, and how it still hurts so much to know I'm not going to be involved with his growing up, and…" 

Coming to a thankfully empty lounge, Jesse looked up at Mark and sighed, shaking his head. 

"Mark, I've no qualms about standing by Susan… and I know she wants me involved with the baby… 

but if this relationship is headed where I think it is, I have to know that I'm doing the right thing… 

not just for the short term, but… well, the right thing for the right reasons, and…"

"And you don't feel that you are…?" Mark asked gently, allowing himself a privately relieved smile. At least now he knew that Susan's plans, both short term and long, included Jesse… and yet…

"To be honest, Mark, I'm not sure what I feel…" Jesse admitted, that uncertainty clear in his eyes.

"I – I mean, I meant what I said to Grace before she left… you know, about my priorities changing… and I was serious about settling down with her, and being a father to Casey, and…"

"And it would never have worked…" Mark cut in softly, meeting dismayed eyes with a gentle smile.

"Jess, I don't doubt how much you'd come to love Casey… but that would never have been enough…

Grace didn't love you… and it wouldn't have been fair on any of you to pretend that she did…"

As Jesse nodded in grudging agreement, Mark then gave his young friend a consoling pat on his back.

"Jess, you were still recovering from an experience that almost… well, I don't need to remind you… 

not surprisingly, that ordeal had such a profound effect on you that… well, yes, you're right… 

and I'm sure Steve will have told you that nothing changes your life more than almost losing it…" 

Not wanting to dwell on a still painful subject, Mark squeezed his shoulder once more and smiled. 

"But where I know Grace wasn't in love with you, Jess, I also know that Susan most certainly is…

and I don't even need to ask if you're still in love with her, because it's written all over your face…"

It was a relief to see Jesse smile, albeit rather sheepishly, as he fingered the rim of his coffee mug.

"I love her so much that it scares me… and I know she feels the same way about me…" he said at last. 

"But she seems kinda jittery… as though she has to know for sure that I'm hers for good now, and… well, I – I know she turned me down when I asked her before, but… well…"

"Something tells me she won't if you ask her again…" Mark cut in with a gently encouraging smile. 

Jesse grinned gratefully back at him and nodded – thinking for a moment before he met Mark's eyes.

"So – So you don't think I'm doing this for my sake more than for Susan and the baby… or…" 

Caught off guard by such candour, Mark then smiled at his young friend and shook his head – 

touched, as he always was, by Jesse's unshakeable faith in coming to him for some fatherly advice.

"Jesse Travis, you will never be so cynical…" he chuckled – more serious as he added proudly,

"But you will be the best possible father… not only that, you'll be doing so for all the right reasons…

because this baby will grow up surrounded by the genuine love and commitment of both of you…

and, Jesse, if ever there were two people destined to raise a family together, it's you and Susan…"

To his relief, the blue eyes that met his were now clear again – enough to risk some gentle teasing.

"And if it's a boy… well, at least now you know the right way to change his diaper…"

That won him a rueful glare – promptly followed by a long fit of tension-breaking laughter.

They were still trading chuckles over that charming if rather icky experience when Susan appeared.

"I don't think I dare ask…" she said dryly, smiling too though as she came to sit beside them.

Jesse's delighted grin at her return then faded slightly at the prospect of yet more domestication. 

"Well, if we're finished here, we still have a date with your washing machine and a _lot_ of laundry…" 

While clearly amused by Jesse's plaintive wince, Mark knew better than to question its cause.

Besides, he had the distinct impression there was more to the grins that followed than met the eye. 

So instead he walked them back to the lobby, a fatherly hand resting on each of their shoulders.

Steve met them there – with, judging by the smile on his face, the good news they'd hoped for. 

"I suggest you keep this somewhere very safe…" he said, handing Susan her disclaiming letter.

"I've taken a copy for our records downtown, just in case he tries to cause trouble in the future.

And you should give copies to your attorneys and any other relevant parties as soon as you can.

Even though he's made it pretty clear that he's not interested in providing for you or the baby,

you'll need this as proof of evidence if… well, if he ever changes his mind…"

As Susan nodded and smiled her thanks, Jesse glanced up at Mark in his own silent gratitude – 

a new, hopeful excitement in his eyes causing Mark's smile to widen as he watched them go.

He could fairly guess what that look had meant, but… well, he'd find out for sure soon enough…

"Well, at least now she can settle down and start planning for the future…" Steve went on –

wondering how much he dared to read into his father's quietly hopeful, cryptic reply.

"Yes, she can… more to the point, so can Jesse…" 

He'd had to wait a little while longer before getting her home, to the question he longed to ask her.

Always the more impulsive of the two, Susan had clearly taken Steve's advice to immediate heart.

And Jesse had his own reasons for getting all the legal paperwork resolved as quickly as possible.

By the time they reached his apartment, Jesse ruefully realised that question would have to wait.

The mood between them was different now, and Susan's concerns had moved from letters to laundry. 

Hardly the most ideal time to ask her the most important question of his life – or the most romantic.

Besides, he thought wryly, I've waited this long. A few more hours won't make any difference…

So instead, with laundry complete and Susan curled up in his arms, it was another quiet evening in – which at least gave him a chance to start planning how to ask that all important question. 

The romantic in him would certainly approve of the traditional, down on bended knee approach, but…

well, that quirky imagination of his already had other ideas…

Susan could only wonder at what lay behind Jesse's sudden disappearance into his bedroom, 

or the not quite innocent enough smile on his face when he returned several minutes later.

Then again, she mused, watching him stretch out on the couch, she knew the perfect way to find out. 

A particularly ticklish spot between his third and fourth ribs, if memory served correctly…

It did – in highly amusing fashion as Jesse was instantly reduced to a squirming, giggling heap.

"Hey, what – what was that for…?" he protested, trying in vain to wriggle away from her. 

"I know that look, Jesse Travis…" she chided him, clearly enjoying herself as she kept on tickling. "And you should know better than to try and use it on me… you're up to something…"

"No – No, I'm not…!" Jesse spluttered, trying to wriggle, breathe, speak and laugh at the same time.

Trapped against the armrest, and with Susan far from convinced, he was soon howling for mercy – trying frantically to find a way to get her to stop without spoiling the surprise he'd planned for her.

"I – I mean, yes… yes, I am, but… but it's a surprise for later…" he finally managed between yelps. 

"And… and it's really special, and… and it's something you're really gonna love, and… and…

well, you don't want me to tell you what it is and ruin it, now… do you…?"

To his relief the torment stopped as, curiosity piqued, Susan eyed him in shrewd amusement.

"How special…?" she asked, hand still poised to ensure complete and total honesty.

Still catching his breath, Jesse thought for a moment, before a broad grin spread over his face.

"This special…" he said softly – silencing and stopping her the best way he knew how.

Now it was Susan's turn to be left rather short for breath as the kiss grew in depth and intensity.

Eager to reciprocate, she kissed him back – more and more eagerly as he fell back beneath her. 

Unfortunately, his modest two seater couch hadn't really been designed for such rigorous activity.

Gallant to the last, and enjoying Susan's therapy too much to notice, Jesse took the fall for both of them – providing Susan with by far the more comfortable landing as they rolled themselves clear off the couch, to land in a startled, winded, hysterically giggling heap on the floor.

"Wow, talk about your Earth moving…" Jesse murmured at last, barely able to giggle the punchline. 

"So, how was it for you…?"

"Getting better by the second…" came the just as giggly reply from somewhere inside his shirt collar – further comment from either side then lost in a long, deep kiss which neither made any attempt to break.

"You know, we should fall off the couch more often…" Jesse mused when that kiss finally ended – 

resting his head against Susan's arm and staring up at the ceiling with half closed, pleasure filled eyes.

"Yeah, I could really get to like it down here… I mean, the floor definitely has its advantages… 

for a start, there's less distance to fall, and there's plenty of room to wriggle around, and…"

"Shut up, Jesse, you're rambling…" Susan chided him, from the base of his throat this time – 

loving the sound of his laughter as she kissed him quiet.

Although ideal in the less distance to fall stakes, even the thickly carpeted floor soon lost its appeal – 

and Jesse had more reason than its hardness against his back to suggest somewhere more familiar.

They reached both room and bed with neither of them knowing nor caring how they got there. 

Finally comfortable, and with all the room they could ask for, they were soon lost in each other. 

Not in the passionate frenzy of before, but a slow and gentle expression of love and commitment. 

Hour after hour of undemanding pleasure, creating just the kind of contented mood that Jesse wanted.

"I don't think there'll be many times in my life when I'll feel happier than this…" Susan whispered, 

guessing from Jesse's enraptured smile that he was enjoying this shared gentleness as much as she was. 

Assuming this was the surprise he'd mentioned earlier, she then playfully kissed the tip of his nose.

"And all the time you can make me feel like this, feel free to surprise me any time you want…"

To her intrigued surprise, Jesse started to laugh as he modestly shrugged his shoulders.

"Well, thanks for the compliment and all, but this wasn't quite the surprise I meant…" he said at last, 

an already broad smile widening further still as he prompted her with a gentle kiss on her forehead. 

"But since you mention it, you… uh… might want to check under the pillow…"

Needless to say, Susan was already scrambling excitedly and very enjoyably across him to reach it. 

It was a dead heat as to who looked the more excited as she drew out then opened a small, velvet box.

Susan could only stare at the ring within – a classic diamond solitaire, set in a crown of golden hearts. Its beauty and significance left her speechless… its past poignancy, though, returning to haunt her. 

She thought he'd been joking, his change of heart over marriage a desperate ploy to get her to stay.

How wrong she'd been – about that, and leaving him, and so much else besides…

"Oh, Jesse, you really wanted to marry me… and I thought you were just…" she finally whispered – the blameless understanding in his eyes making it impossible for her to say any more.

Guessing that the tears in her eyes weren't entirely of joy, Jesse smiled and brushed them away. 

"Hey, come on now, that's all in the past… this is for the present and the future…" he told her gently, holding her protectively closer as he continued to try and reassure her. "Susan, I love you so much… 

and while I can't promise never to make you angry, I promise I'll do all I can to make you happy…" 

Taking a deep breath, Jesse then looked up at her with a nervous expectancy that squeezed her heart. "So, for the present and the future… for the rest of our lives… Susan, will you marry me…?"

Too choked to speak, Susan just nodded, her hand understandably shaky as she lifted the ring out.

Seeing this, Jesse smiled and gently took her hand to steady it while taking the ring back again – 

sharing and enjoying her delight as it slid as though destined onto her finger.

"Oh, Jesse, it's a perfect fit…!" she breathed, looking up at him in delighted, admiring surprise.

"But how did you know the right size…? I – I mean, you never bought me a ring before…"

"But Greg did…" Jesse explained with a slight smile. "And you wore it on the same size finger, so…" Susan smiled back, thankfully unfazed by this reminder of her late but not lamented fiancé. 

"So when you suggested I donate it to your cousin's maritime museum…" she said at last, 

her accusatory tone betrayed by a delighted chuckle of laughter as Jesse grinned and shrugged.

"I made a slight detour on the way and had a jeweller check its size for me…" he admitted, 

turning more serious as he met her eyes once more. "So, do – do you like it…?"

"Jesse, it's perfect… simply beautiful…" she assured him, though her smile didn't reach her eyes. 

"Though after the way I treated you, I'm surprised you didn't take it back for a refund…"

"Sh, all in the past now…" Jesse reminded her, persuasively kissing away any further argument.

Her conscience finally clear, Susan enjoyed a little more persuasion then suddenly started to laugh.

"What…?" Jesse asked, his curious amusement only increasing as Susan shook her head. 

"No, I was just thinking…" she said at last, more seriously thoughtful as she studied her ring.

"When you opened your door to me on Friday, I was expecting no more than a shoulder to cry on… 

I don't think either of us could ever have dreamed it would lead to this…"

"Well, no… though I'm not complaining…" Jesse grinned, then frowned at a worrying thought.

"Why, you don't think this is happening too fast, do you…?" he asked, looking anxiously up at her.

"I mean, we don't have to get married right away, but… well, if you want to, there's a lot to sort out… for one thing, we'll have to find a new apartment so we can get a nursery ready for the baby, and…" 

"Jesse, we have plenty of time to take care of that…" Susan cut in with a gentle, calming smile.

"And I don't care if we get married next week or next year… I just want to enjoy you and the baby…" 

Seeing the doubt that lingered in his eyes, she kissed him until all trace of those doubts disappeared.

Even when she felt him relax, she kept stroking his face, just for the sheer pleasure of touching him.

"I let you get away from me once…" she added softly, her next words brooking no further argument. "Believe me, Jesse, I have no intention of letting you get away again…"

"That's fine by me… because I have no intention of going anywhere without you…" Jesse murmured, his eyes never straying from hers as he lifted Susan's hand and placed a chivalrous kiss on her ring.

Her delighted smile prompted another, just as gentle and tender – holding a promise of so much more.

Clearly enjoying this most romantic of moments, Susan then rested her head back against his shoulder,

thoughtful for several moments while she traced her fingers along his collarbone.

"I've really turned your life upside down, haven't I…?" she said at last, smiling impishly up at him.

"I mean, from freewheeling bachelor to semi domesticated fiancé in just three days…" 

"Yes, my pink shirted days are truly and thankfully over…" Jesse grinned in equally wry agreement. 

While enjoying the laughter that followed, his eyes remained thoughtful as he stroked her forearm.

"No, Susan, my life needed shaking up, and… well, I guess that shaking up started last week…

it took nearly losing it to make me realise how empty my life was… how much of a rut I was in…"

Seeing her eyes widen in concern, he then smiled a little sheepishly and hastened to reassure her. 

"I – I guess what I'm trying to say is… well, now that you're here, my life isn't empty any more…

and while I'm sorry for what forced you to come back here, I can't say I'm sorry that you are…"

"Neither can I…" Susan replied just as softly, looking up at him out of now bright, mischievous eyes.

"For one thing, you've found a wonderful cure for my morning sickness…!"

"One you won't find in any medical textbooks…" Jesse observed with a drowsily playful grin.

"Which is just as well… imagine the stir it would cause in the doctors' lounge…" Susan agreed dryly. Enjoying and sharing his laughter, she thought for a moment before the grin mischievously widened. "Maybe when we're both old and grey and safely retired, you can mention it in your memoirs… 

for now, though… well, let's just keep it our little secret…"

Laughing too much to either agree or argue, Jesse simply nodded and held her gently closer – 

so aware of the pleasure of her nearness as she snuggled herself against him. 

Lulled by the sound of his heartbeat, Susan quickly drifted into a sound and contented sleep, 

murmuring in the pleasure of both dreams and reality as Jesse brushed her hair back from her face.

Cloud nine, and climbing… he thought, smiling as her arm wrapped itself snugly around his neck. 

Softly kissing her forearm, he then rested his head against hers and finally closed his eyes –

a smile of total contentment settling on his face as he joined her in the pleasure of her dreams.

By the time they arrived for their shifts at the hospital, Jesse had more or less returned to Earth, 

his still dazed grin and exuberant wave causing Mark and Amanda to trade fondly proud glances. 

"I think our little boy is in love…" Amanda said at last, glancing up at her equally amused friend – 

intrigued by that familiar, I-know-something-you-don't smile which had spread across Mark's face.

Puzzled, too, by her realisation that Jesse and Susan had arrived two clear hours before their shifts started.

Before she could pursue it, though, Mark stepped forward to greet his young friends with a discreet wink, sharing with them an equally secretive smile as all four then headed towards the doctors' lounge.

News of that very special something had come in a typically excited phone call earlier that morning.

And while understandably eager for Amanda and Steve to learn and celebrate this wonderful news too, 

as Jesse had then shyly explained, after all his help from yesterday, it seemed only right to tell him first. 

Their only concern now was keeping that news to themselves until Steve could join them at the hospital.

Mark just hoped that his son arrived soon as he watched Jesse make his usual beeline for the coffeemaker. 

His young friend couldn't keep still for long at the best of times, let alone when he was excited as this.

So it was with some relief that he now saw a familiar if rather weary figure heading towards the lounge. 

Gathering evidence for his latest case, Steve had also spent the last two nights without getting much rest – 

although, as Jesse and Susan quietly noted, his sleepless nights had been a lot less enjoyable than theirs. 

That much was obvious, just by the speed with which Steve now moved to the coffee machine.

"Well, I hope you guys had more fun last night than I did…" he said at last, flopping onto the couch – thankfully too tired to question why such an innocuous remark should cause Jesse to choke on his coffee. 

With Susan's help, he'd barely caught his breath before Steve unwittingly caused him to lose it again.

"Hey, Jess, what are you doing here so early…? What's the matter, couldn't you get any sleep either…?" 

"Actually, no… at least, not since three this morning…" Jesse finally replied, his face still rather flushed. 

Glancing briefly at Mark, he then cast Susan a gently encouraging smile as both rose to their feet. 

Taking a deep breath, and with all things considered, a remarkable calmness, he then added softly, 

"But all things considered, I can't really complain… I mean, I _had_ just asked Susan to marry me, so…" 

"I said yes, by the way…" Susan added helpfully into the wide eyed, dumbstruck silence that followed.

"So soon…?" Steve said at last – meeting four politely startled faces with a somewhat rueful afterthought.

"Oh boy, I cannot believe I actually said that…"

"Hey, Steve, that's okay…" Jesse retorted, giving his still mortified friend a reassuring pat on his back. 

"Take it from someone who knows, nothing addles your brain cells more than sleep deprivation…"

Thinking for a moment, the grin then mischievously widened as he nodded meaningfully towards Mark.

"Word of advice, though… if your dad gives you cocoa tonight, get it checked by the drugs squad first…"

"Thanks, Dorothy, I'll bear that in mind…" Steve shot back, grinning at his helplessly laughing father. 

With order now more or less restored, the celebrations finally got under way in a shower of excited hugs. 

And amidst all the laughter, Steve could return to what he did best. Tormenting his honorary little brother. 

"Well, Susan, I'm delighted… not to mention relieved…" he went on, giving Jesse a proud, playful hug. "You're the only woman I've ever met who can keep this little lunatic of ours under control…"

"Yeah, that's right… _hey_…!" Jesse protested, narrowing his eyes at his friend. "Did you just insult me…?"

"No more so than usual…" Steve shot back, unfazed as usual by his young friend's indignant glare.

"Well, I wouldn't go that far…" Susan giggled, laughing still more at the plaintive look on Jesse's face. 

"But give me another day or so, and I'll soon have him licked back into shape…"

Steve grinned back – guessing from Jesse's beet red face how enjoyable those coming days would be.

While Susan proudly showed off her ring to Mark and Amanda, he then turned back to Jesse and smiled.

"You do realise that Susan will talk your ears off for the rest of your life, don't you…?" he asked dryly.

"Yes, I know…" Jesse agreed, casting Susan a glance of pure love before his grin mischievously widened. 

"But I also know the perfect way to get her to stop…"


End file.
